Steve Mayeda

During my long lasting hobby of checking out various coaches and lifestyle trainers I’ve already wrote about Corey Wayne. Corey was directing himself towards a bit of  a healthy Red Pill and at the same time being aware of the whole MGTOW movement, but never really indulging in it and being accused of never proving to be with any girl (personally why he should share his private life with strangers?). Plenty of people find out that his methods are simply accurate and I respect his work towards celebrating healthy masculinity.

..then there’s this guy – Steve Mayeda. He’s openly admitting being in a long term relationship with two kids and an admirably cute wife. Of course, he posts pictures of his own family openly on varous social media and there are people hating him for this. You see the pattern? Once you’re more or less successful, the haters always come and try to put you down.

I must admit it, I really do like his balanced and mature content. Just as Corey Wayne admitted that he had a fucked up childhood with schizophrenic mother and some alcohol involved, so do Steve openly says that he had a drug addiction problem in the past and that he had done plenty of cheating in his older relationships. I’ve listened to a good bit of his podcasts and he raises a lot of good points. Of course, half of the MGTOWalready maturedcommunity of kids will shut down his message because he dears to say that he doesn’t fancy MGTOW. How dare he can have his own opinion! But this only proves the things he is saying about. I recommend you watch this video where he is talking about important topics – rape, consent, being sexual and also MGTOW and The Red Pill for a bit. It might open your eyes that there is more than one side to the same topic we talk about. Masculinity is complex. You might not agree with everything but if you consciously choose to limit yourself to just one worldview, you’re hurting yourself. 

 

There’s of course a small hook: his The Sexual Life package comes with a price: 2000 USD dollars. You can as well join his Men’s Development Group on Facebook which is free and consist mostly of a group of men coming from mixed backgrounds. Personally, I haven’t found there anything extremely useful. This is often the cause in a very moderated and somewhat censored groups. Why I use the word censored? Well, I should say moderated but is there a difference? 😉 If you’re a hard radical MGTOW you won’t have your voice heard over there. Same probably goes with The Red Pill. And I get it, it’s his own project so he sets up the rules.  But apart from that, his YouTube content is free. If I was to choose from RSD Tyler , Corey Wayne and Mayeda’s content at this moment I would probably went with Mayeda. However, there’s a nice twist to this story and you will find out about it after reading the whole article.

But back to the topic, being a man doesn’t mean we should limit ourselves to just one idea. This is why I’m slowly migrating away from pure MGTOW content here. During the last 2,5 years I’ve touched on PUAs, The Red Pill and MGTOW topics massively and frequently. Now, we will be moving straight into more clear masculinity topics. I believe that the best thing is to mix and match everything to suits your own personal needs. In life, there are no definite sets of data that mark your journey as ever finished. Believing that would lead to stagnation and that’s not what we want. At least not what I want.

I recently received an email from one of my readers who share my current view on the whole manosphere scene, so to say. MGTOW community has quickly become very closed and hermetic which is self-limiting in itself. Instead of development it causes stagnation. I believe that a true man would never limit himself because then what’s the difference from being a fanatic? Or a feminist? There is none. Sex and desire is a beautiful thing, women should not be hated. I believe that we can produce great things but only together, when our gender differences are being celebrated instead of forcefully put together under the “gender equality” bullshit. We are not equal, but we aren’t better or worse. We are just different.

Of course I will probably face a heavy backlash from the MGTOW community because I am saying this. They say they don’t hate women but they are lying. They do. And most of the people saying they are identifying themselves as MGTOWs are just inexperienced kids who never been in a serious relationship or “get laid” enough. They hide behind the MGTOW tag because they were hurt and they carry on their own trauma (maybe they had a shitty parents, or a toxic relationship with their own mother?) That’s a very bad approach. Any radical approach is usually very bad. It won’t lead them to happiness. Of course, there are exceptions but I am talking about the main current. I’m in my middle 30s. I don’t want to castrate myself and forcefully shut down my libido. Why would I? Sex is great. If you look at sex only from the side of women using you, you won’t ever be at peace with yourself. If you were hurt during bad relationship, or sex or whatever – you won’t cure and heal this trauma by shutting yourself out from sex, relationships with other people/women. It simply won’t work. It will just isolate you more. And no, this doesn’t mean I am recommending going into long term relationships with women – I don’t. I wonder how many of you already went into meltdown. See, how crazy and close-minded you are about this? Wake the fuck up. Right now! You are planning to be a monk until you’re 70 and your dick stops working? Really? Good luck. 

If I can get good sex and enjoy the company of women, all of the tension disappears and I simply enjoy myself being a man. Being not an alpha man, not a radical MGTOW, not a master Red Piller, not some sort of another weird label that only limits my expression but being a man. 

As for me, MGTOW was an important step during  my personal journey of discovering who I am myself and who I want to become. It was a step and not a final nail to my coffin. See the difference here? What I discovered was a man who don’t want to hate women, enjoy spending time with them, love having sex with them and a good laugh. I enjoy being at peace with myself and other human beings and I say no to hate and negativity towards the other gender. That doesn’t mean I will tolerate any breach of my own personal boundaries. ejaculating 3 times per day to internet porn with females in itBut how any modern male can have strong personal boundaries and talking about being a strong man yet at the same time is beyond me. So many of them need to just grow up and mature. Again – any radical approach is usually very bad. It might not feel like that at first, but then it will hit you. It will hit you when you will be lonely, surrounded by toxic emotions and feeling lost. We need more than just internet pseudo-friends who will support our twisted view on the world. And yes, there are more to being a male than just one way of living. Take this report of Mayeda’s receiving a birth of his own son. No, I don’t want kids. I don’t want a wife. But I still can appreciate his story and be open to the great beauty and mystery of life.

As Mayeda says:

“The social movements that are coming from damage, that are coming from people’s pain… the men’s movement, the women’s movement. You guys are the same fucking thing! You just coming from different angles but both of you depended on detachment and controlled definition of the others to empower yourselves. Traumatic bonding. It could be men coming together to talk shit about women or women coming together to talk shit about men. Or it can be people dysfunctionally coming together through sex.

Can’t really add anything to it. It sums it all up, perfectly. If your goal was to cure & heal yourself MGTOW will probably become just one step in a long journey. If your goal was to isolate yourself and spread hate, you are probably going to stay inside those already very isolated circles.

So far so good, right? Almost too good to be true. I was so close to admitting and going with the conclusion that Mayeda is the real deal here… however, however! Read this up gentlemen! I joined his free FB group under one of my alter egos so that I cannot be recognized as “this dude Datson Horrenbrand with unpopular opinions!” and made a random comment under some of other user’s post. He added a link depicting a typical men shaming story. I won’t go into the details, but a dude posted a hyperlink to an article fear mongering about the topic similar to the rape culture man-spreading (and all that craziness) asking what the members thought about it. Looked like a normal question. I replied that it looked to me like a typical click-bait article that only puts men in the bad light and certainly does not do anything good for the women either. Few hour later my post was deleted. No explanation, no nothing. If this is how his project works, I am out of it. I admire Mayeda’s message and in many parts I agree with it  however, I will never agree to censorship like this on any sort of social media. This is exactly what killed Mgtow.co forum. If I am not allowed to voice my thoughts, what’s the whole point of the “development”? It becomes an isolated group just like MGTOWs or TRP or PUAs are. Okay, maybe they don’t want to stir unnecessary discussions. Maybe they only want “already matured” individuals that are okay with any sort of content. Bear in mind that after reading this group plenty of men felt to me like typical manginas/blue-pillers and no, I won’t drop these labels Mayeda… they are real and useful. And my comment wasn’t radical. I wasn’t bragging about MGTOW or anything. Or hating women in it.

After a short research I’ve found out that the guy posting that link was added by another dude, who was added to the group by Steve Mayeda himself. That another dude is an admin there. So the whole puzzle is solved for me. Another FB admin on a power trip unfairly covering ass of his colleague.

It looks like a little circle of mutual admiration. And don’t forget, if you still need some development as a man and you think that other men can teach you something, you are also willing to pay 2k USD to join Mayeda’s inner circle on The Sexual Life platform/community. As of now, Corey Wayne has also a nice and sensible stuff that has much more views and is not asking for such a huge amount of money for his paid content/coaching. Remember that always when you will feel “not complete” there will be people trying to sell you stuff. Mayeda often brags how he slept with hundreds of women. I doubt it. Why create such unrealistic stories? It just sounds not true. And it’s stupid because he is trying to sell much more worthy content.

Aha! One more thing – final nail to his coffin. One other person posted a picture telling a story about someone who was divorce-raped. “Wanted to get some opinions on this. I couldn’t imagine what I would do in this situation, but from the looks of what’s written here and based on current political climate, it doesn’t look like there’s much a man can do once it’s in motion. One has to get as skilled in early detection and disassociation of such people, it seems…” he wrote under the pic. Mayeda quickly responded So if you’re passionate about an issue like this 1) Help that person 2) Work on changing the laws or the court systems 3) Don’t think complaining or gossiping is changing anything”. He also explained why he believes this is the right way. I won’t cite the whole answer but just a short point from me: I don’t think this is complaining or gossiping. This is spreading the truth about what some women can do to you. Just my five cents on this.

From what he wrote it looks like Mayeda’s was divorce-raped himself. He replied how he “sucked it up”, paid 50k in legal fees, went to jail, have not been able to see his kids for 5 years… pretty tough shit. He said that “one should learn how to differentiate crazy people from non-crazy people, don’t think everybody is crazy, don’t make it a cause, accept full responsibility – for instance at all points in my life something bad happened, it was usually because I put myself in the situation, don’t blame people, KNOW THAT LIFE WILL FUCK YOU…When you GET FUCKED move on; So I know a lot of happy people who are successful with money and business and they have all been screwed and write it off and move on…then make money and life happen.  Then I know people who get screwed and complain about it and they are never successful in anyway. ”  

And I agree with that! But at least in my opinion he should know better that not every man is aware about divorce-rape and not talking about such sad news causes men even more harm than pretending nothing bad is happening. 

At this point I’ve left Mayeda’s free group being disappointed from the double standards that are present there – I remember when he stated in one of his videos how he doesn’t agree with the typical description how men should be “alpha” and so on, yet a friend of a friend (the one I replied to with the post that was deleted later) posted about a well-known article about descriptions of various types of men- from Beta, to Alpha. Guess what? It wasn’t deleted. So yeah, mixed conclusions. Double standards and censorship connected with favoring your own circle of people? Fuck that shit. What’s the difference between this and RSD Tyler who is also asking for huge amount of money to sell you false hopes. I don’t see any. Sad, because Mayeda’s content has already earned a place in my heart. And by the way, I am always a bit skeptical about a dude who is married with kids talking about “hundreds and hundreds of sexual lays, hook-ups, orgies and what-not”… I don’t know… maybe he’s right, maybe not. But for sure he didn’t had hundreds of them. That number is just not rational. So why lie? Does lie sell? Maybe it does.

Well, we are all humans and it seems to me that I no longer want to join any of the other men’s circles. I haven’t found any that I could identify with in 100%. You might already sense what this means. Instead, as yet another side project (separate from RedMaleHummingbird), I am slowly creating my own.

Moving forward.

Across the past two years this website gained a pretty significant audience – at the moment of writing this article Red Male Hummingbird has 140377 views. That is a huge number especially if you take into consideration almost no promotion or advertising. I tend to be very open and honest about stuff like this so I can admit that I don’t want to lose that audience. Who would want it? It’s fun. And it makes this whole project much more pleasant. However, above everything I need to remain true to myself. As you could notice the usual number of articles during recent two months went down a bit. There was a reason behind it and until now I didn’t had a good way to put it into words.

But here it goes: The formula of this blog as it is right now- dedicated purely towards MGTOW/TRP– no longer serves me.

Stardusk/Thinking-Ape in his recent piece is talking about a very similar topic. I will cite a few important comments/points from it (from random people) and I recommend you to watch it, too:

Stardusk – Das Reinheitsgebot, Beer and the Nature of Reality

Arcesious 2 weeks ago
I learned a lot from MGTOW. But at this point I no longer wish to identify with the label. I don’t want to tie myself down to any way of thinking so much so that I potentially blind myself. At the moment I still don’t wish to pursue a relationship or having children, but I want to keep an open mind. At some point I may try it out as an experiment. The only constant for me ‘ideologically’ seems to be a mix of empiricism and rationalism respectively, depending on which provides the most utility to investigating something.

Trevor Cormier
Even if all the bad legality was reformed you know by now that you’re are going to be involved an unequal relationship with diminishing returns over time. Some guys are willing to accept that. From the couples I’ve seen, the guy finds his life inevitably bogged down in banality, endless obligation and shots to his dignity from time to time.?

Arcesious
I saw what was happening to all the men around me and due to a questioning nature and introverted/solitary personality found MGTOW circles. After that I had a much broader idea of what was going on. I’ve heard countless horror stories and subsequent success stories and I’ve listened to/read content from all over the loose affiliations that make up the ‘MGTOW-sphere’. I know it inside and out, and was even active in a couple places dedicated to discussing the topic for some time. Not going to forget one iota of it or ignore the implications. I’m probably still going to keep ‘going my own way’ all but in name, it’s just out of principle that I want to stay open to experience/new information.?

realverdade 2 weeks ago
Arcesious more and more I notice that men who question mgtow weren’t significantly scarred by women. It might have some correlation and my assumption is that one can only go mgtow if they have battle scars.?

Arcesious 2 weeks ago
Heh, I’m just glad no one made any dumb comments like ‘you were never a real mgtow’, ‘you haven’t internalized the redpill about hypergamy’, or ‘oh look another simp going back to the plantation’. I just don’t believe anything should or can be above interrogation. I’ve had experiences of my own that colored my perception and one in particular that was actually all on me and my own youthful naivety, but I wouldn’t call them significant enough to qualify as having been ‘burned’.?

..and so on. First of all I believe that those “battle scars” which were mentioned above are necessary – not for you going MGTOW but just for your own development as a man. I love labels but at the same time I hate them. Why? They start to limit you at some point. Like “Oh, you’re enjoying the company of women? You’re no longer MGTOW!” (just to give one silly example) My journey went through various experiences with women in short long and casual relationships over more than 30 years of my life and past that. I travelled from the usual Blue Pilled monkey through The Red Pill and finally MGTOW. Every step on my journey had a somewhat clear label and a significant meaning.

Would you still be “MGTOW” even when you have a good relationships with women are popular and enjoying a lot of sex on a regular basis? Probably. But I have a feeling that this isn’t that common across men from most of the forums dedicated to MGTOW I’ve encountered during my experience in making of the RedMaleHummingbird. What you concentrate on tends to grow. There is a lot of hate towards women across all those forums (and even in older articles here, on this blog). And that’s something I really don’t want in my life anymore. It’s not even about hate towards women. It’s about hate itself. Negative energy. Pessimism. Lack of direction. Life is too short to indulge in emotions like that. Hate leads nowhere. At least not-where-I-want-to-be.

My own articles about healthy living and motivation were the least popular. The ones about sex, call-girls and how women are bad/evil/stupid were the biggest hits. Isn’t that interesting? At one point it hit me: I no longer feel as being caught up by those negative feelings/emotions and I don’t want to experience them again and again like some twisted fetish yet the community somewhat expects this from me. That’s when I stopped writing for a while. There’s no fun when you need to write something that doesn’t matter for you anymore just to get another 1k visitors. At least not for free. 😉

Ok, women are this and that. Briffault’s Law. Yeah, I get it. I’ve been there. I wrote about it many times. Anger phase. That’s in my past. But one needs to ask himself: what’s next? Of course there’s no turning back. The only way leads forward. And what’s in there?

I won’t be having kids, getting married or boring my ass out in LTR, don’t worry. That didn’t changed. Maybe it will when I’m in my 50s? Who knows. Nobody knows the future. But I don’t think so. I think I will try to write about other topics that interest me, without paying much attention to the number of visitors here. Something that might not even be connected with women at all. We shall see.

I must move on. Being stuck in one place is just stagnation. And stagnation is like mud – various unpleasant things start sticking into you.

See you next time.

PUA Scam

PUA Scam

Nowadays we have three major paths for men – PUA, The Red Pill and MGTOW.

RSD Tyler/Julien/Todd and the rest of their crew are a nicely cut fake scam artists. (just google “RSD faking infields” and do some research if their method works and check articles like this one ) If you ever tried their methods, you would knew what I’m saying. The only possibility of a quick make out exist if the girl is already after at least few drinks. And usually after few too many! Same with pulls. I don’t know about you, but I don’t find a lot of fun in sleeping with stinking smelly drunkards especially as I don’t drink at all anymore. So, the only way is the casual way. It takes hours out of your evening. It might be faster if you’re still in your 20s and partying in really big cities with like minded people.

If you keep stalking girls that are out just to be a little crazy and to have fun, you’d be blown out many, many times. From time to time you will get results but it’s just a numbers game. It’s not due to your “game” or some magic PUA skills. You will waste time, effort, money and your health – you can as well go to the good quality escort. You’ll get a similar dopamine rush before during and after. At least you can have better pre selection. 😉 Besides, go on and try to go out 3-4 times per week when having a normal day job and being in your middle 30s. It’s tiring. It’s pointless. It’s not that much of a fun, especially if you’re not a heavily extroverted person. And even if you are? I remember watching one video when RSD Tyler/Owen jokingly says that their business model was basically to outline the basics and then complicate them, and keep doing it so at the end the onion has so many layers that nobody knows what’s going on anymore. It works for clueless men who come to their seminars. 2k per one + millions of views on YT + thousands of dollars for their learning programs made them very rich indeed. Remember that sex won’t make you happy if your life is empty. If your life is empty, no woman would want to join your party, either. Owen likes to say that you should “ignore the negative energy” coming from a girl or better, ignore the negativity altogether. And stop listening to the voice in your head. Of course I agree that we shouldn’t overthink stuff too much, but saying that one should ignore your own intuitive voice is just stupid. After many years I’ve finally learnt how to get in touch with my own intuition and I won’t be dropping it anytime soon. Owen has a lot of good ideas that can be applied to a daily life, though. I don’t try to undermine that. Also he certainly posses a very magnetic persona – probably due to some personality issues. He confirmed this himself many times, by the way. Don’t forget that most people out there are just trying to sell you something and make themselves rich. The main point is that you don’t need their magic pills.

After three years…

Radical MGTOW version/way is, well, too radical… I am not impotent, I am not afraid of women, I don’t hate them, they like me and I like them. I have high sexual drive. I love sex and I love women who love sex. I won’t be pretending that’s not the case. We live in a very connected world and shutting myself away from any contact with the opposite gender doesn’t work for me. I don’t need to do this nor I want to do this, either.

So, what’s left? Well, the classical The Red Pill theory. After deep research of both PUA and MGTOW ways, I am going more towards TRP tradition now. And I must admit that Corey Wayne is still portraying the most balanced version of who I am becoming/want to become. His teachings lie somewhere between classical PUA, TRP and MGTOW. With a strong nudge towards TRP side that encourages short/medium term relationships but without radical absurdities of PUAs and monk-mode-MGTOWs.

Women are just women. We won’t change them. And they won’t change us. They are still better placed than us, because they can choose between beta “mangina” providers and alpha “IDGAF” fucks (or just between men believing in LTRs/Love/Kids/Marriage and ones that no longer believe in that bullshit) and that’s about it. We don’t have much choice. 😉 I don’t mind. I buy it. Life is short. Soon, all of us will be dead.

Life is  full of suffering. Yet, life is so beautiful. 

Forge through it. Find your own way.

Enjoy it while you can.

Love =/= Control?

Ultimately, we are all alone. And that’s fine.

And love is a scam. I am not talking about the universal cosmic love. That is something of far wider perspective. But our earthly, human love? It’s a scam. Biological imperative crafted by nature to maintain the continuity of human species.

We are being told that in order to love truly you need to love freely. To give freedom to the person that we love. But yet, at some another level, love also means control. And control means to worry. And you worry to lose someone you love because you care about them. And you can lose a person in many different ways. The feeling that a father has when his daughter slips into drug addiction? That hopeless realization that nothing can be done in order to save her? Yet, he tries to do it nevertheless. And only when he realizes there’s truly nothing he can do to help her, he quits. And gives up. It’s a tremendous sadness mixed with sorrow and grief. This is how I feel now. One of the people that were close to me, deliberately and stubbornly chooses the wrong path for herself. And just like in those books we’ve been told to never read, a small part of myself dies within. This is because a part of myself, of my heart, was living inside of her. And nothing can be done. After so many years of hard work and hope that one can recognize and change the bad habits. You can only save yourself. Other people don’t give a fuck about you or your hope to help them. They don’t want to be saved.

“I am happy only when I am unhappy”

Apparently a parent can never give up and leave his own child. Maybe some of them can. Maybe they do it only on the surface but deep down nothing is being resolved, and there’s no peace at heart. Ever. Maybe sometimes life throws us towards similar experiences, so that we can gain knowledge and recognize patterns.

But after every rainfall, there’s another breakthrough of clear weather. So, on one side I am asking myself “what the hell I am still doing here?” but on the other I know that soon everything will change for the better. For myself. Only for myself.

gergtgr

***

*** Please note that due to privacy concerns, RMH goes under timed maintenance period. Further posts might be delayed until further notice. More information will be posted in the future. ***
there’s no end to this

 

 

How media manipulates us?

 

Women aren’t that pretty.

 

*Please always be careful and be aware of any violation of privacy concerns that might happen when discussing MGTOW topics. We aren’t living in a free speech world anymore.*

Friends

Did we went too far? Way over the top? Before discovering MGTOW/TRP I was able to have normal conversations with people, now the reality makes me unable to befriend people who have different views. It’s like politics- democrats hate liberals and so on. People are so divided. But maybe they were always like that and being an adult means having alienating opinions and just pretending you’re like everyone else? But then, what’s the fucking point if one supposedly posses “freedom of speech” but can’t be using it as it’s not “politically correct”?!

I was talking with a guy that I know. He said he probably don’t want to get married. He is a Muslim, and I like him. He had some signs that he might “get it”. But it’s pointless. Every time I try to explain something to him, he goes into some sort of brain_freeze mode and he isn’t able to say anything except women are equal to men, and period. He doesn’t get any arguments on the table, though. It is just as it is. I call BS on that, though. Have a look:

Him: “You would make a really good dominant daddy-type BF to some young blonde innocent girl, who’d have to agree to everything you’d say For now, just be content in the fact that there are people who are different than you, who are wrong. who believe in so many other things that to you might be laughable, accept them for who they are and do not try and change them even if you do not agree with their beliefs.”

Now, if he had enough of experience he would knew that young blondes are never innocent and they never agree to everything one says. 😉 Some people cannot be saved. The thing is: if you were wrong, would you like to know? Some people just WANT to believe that the earth is flat and they will ditch out anything proving otherwise.

Him: “Hahahaha, you are sexist, women and men are equal you know, so if they can do it why cant men do it”

Me: “Yes, but men don’t have a pussy. maybe some of them do hehe”

Him: “Women do not have a dick, still they are equal to men. They work it out somehow and so can we”

Me: “Sexes aren’t equal. never were, never be. we are different. we have different drives, purposes. to say we are equal means killing the diversity.”

Him: “Don’t ask stupid questions and look for logic. I am not listening to you, WOMEN ARE EQUAL TO MEN and that is the end of it”

However, his argument is objectively valid. People have different views. But if you knew the truth you would want to save your friends, right? Or at least try to explain them something? I can say the same: our MGTOW truth comes from analysis of logical facts. So what part in his rational thinking works different so that he ends up with “men are equal to women”? And every time I try to tell him “they aren’t equal, they are different, 1=1 but x =/= z … not worse or better, but we are not equal” and he simply doesn’t get it. It’s like a brain block or something. I am not even saying they are worse than us! Just different! No! “They are equal”.

I believe he views it not even as “women and men are equal, men were oppressing women for so long, poor females etc” as he doesn’t go that deep into this topic, but rather “women should have equal rights, we should support them”. Like they weren’t able to support themselves – they already are better than us. Much better.

How we can do something with people like him? Is there anything we can do?

I am suffering with inability to speak up my own truth. They can speak their own truth. And I can’t.
I am tired. Tired of societal conditioning. Because nowadays it doesn’t matter what you know or who you are. What matters is how good you can tell silly/funny stories that make women’s laugh. It matters how “social” you are. How many jokes you can make in a minute- of course to make our beloved women happy. It is just stupid.

Antisocial Alpha Male?

what’s the difference between Alpha Male and a Beta Male? Oh wait, everyone already knows that. But what about the other end of the equation – Omega Male. Wait a second, wasn’t he called a Sigma Male some time ago?

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Quick look around the net and I see that Omega Male is being perceived as the most weak fella in the pack:

“As opposed to alpha males and beta males, omega males are the lowest of the low on the man food chain; they’re the type of men who shirk responsibility, refuse to grow up and generally avoid participating in the real world. Omega males take many forms: Grose points to the whiny, wannabe public intellectual, the effete and preening metro-sexual, and the obsessive video game junkie as representatives of this new class of men who have seemingly renounced traditional modes of masculinity.” (from here)

But there’s another piece that depicts Omega as someone completely different:

“The polar opposite of the Alpha Male. Omega Males can have friends and close acquaintances but prefer to accomplish things on their own without the help of a group. Omega Males generally don’t belong to any cliques and have no desire to be the leader or most outstanding of said clique. Omega Males have relations with people from all groups and carry a resourcefulness and cunning (sometimes strength) to get a job done with their own skill. This being said, an omega male can have great pride without it manifesting as “ego.” There are always exceptions. An Alpha Male MUST absolutely be perceived by his peers as the toughest, most popular, and smartest. An Omega Male cares little for this recognition…but knows that he is all those things and more. Alpha males must have the support of his “boys.” This can be the foundation for many shallow and superficial relationships. An Omega Male needs support from time to time, but has few true friends who know him intimately and generally shuns shallow acquaintances. Two sides of the same coin….both being very effective in accomplishing goals. In Animals: Two Rams are butting heads while the female watches. The winner who mates is the strongest and therefore the Alpha Male. Wait…A third ram runs out of the woods and mates with the female while the two males are fighting. THAT is the omega male.” (got it from here)

So, which one is the correct one? I understand that this is just a form of naming a very well known phenomenon of how our personalities can differ and modify the outcome of how we present ourselves. Isn’t the Omega Male just a sort of introverted Alpha Male?
“Most people are at least aware of the alpha male and the beta male from popular culture. We even wrote an article about the alpha male, the beta male and the jerk. However, there is one other type of guy in addition to the traditional two: the omega male. If you have no idea what an omega male is, let me remind you that alpha and beta are the first two letters of the Greek alphabet; omega is the final and 24th letter! The whole alpha, beta, omega thing isn’t really terribly scientific. But, it’s certainly grounded in evolutionary biology, since all animal groups tend have to dominant leaders (alphas) who get to mate the most and pass on their genes, and submissive followers (betas) who rarely get sex. In humans, an “alpha” isn’t the dumb, grunting bully, but a socially successful, confident, and charismatic guy, who leads at work and gets his choice of a variety of women. A “beta” is usually a passive, boring type of guy, who ends up being a “cog in the machine” at work and socially invisible to both men and women. The Omega may be thought of as such an extreme beta that he is on the fringes (in terms of evolutionary genetic “fitness”) of the community or tribe. Thus he gets few resources, like food and sex, and may even be the target of aggression from others within the colony during times of unrest. Men won’t befriend him and women don’t find him attractive. Omega males are the last place according to the terms of society (socially, at least). They typically lack drive to succeed in mainstream ways and have few social skills. An omega male often doesn’t know the line between appropriate and inappropriate or ignores it. Basically, Omega males lack common social skills, and have an inability to read social cues in others. If the conversation turns really creepy and awkward very quickly, it’s likely an omega male at work. In fact, the word creepy is often used of omega males. They can’t pick up when someone is getting uncomfortable with them, and they don’t know how to adjust their approach to others, so they may violate body space, stare excessively, and so forth.  (here you can read more)
So again it feels a bit “off” to me. And what about Sigma?

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I believe that the most correct piece comes from Reddit:


“Alpha Male:
You are confident and your own man. You do your own thing and have complete confidence in everything you do. You have your self doubts, but you don’t let it cloud your judgment and logic. You are well liked by almost everyone, and you just have an easy charm and swagger about your presence. Women are drawn to your charisma and presence. You enjoy being social and having lots of people around, you need constant social interaction otherwise you start to feel depressed or “drained” like your batteries need to recharge. You are a natural leader who actively seeks out leadership positions. Conversely you do not do well answering to authority.

Beta Male: You are kind of shy and introverted and not very confident in yourself. You are constantly plagued by insecurities and self-doubts and you can never commit to anything in the fear that you will fail in it. You are somewhat liked by people but they tend to look at you rather condescendingly and woman tend to friendzone you. You are nervous around other people and social situations because you’re always afraid that people are judging you. You are a born follower. As such these types often do well in specialist positions like research science, especially in the fields of physics and chemistry. Customer service is your nightmare.

Omega Male: You are very much like the alpha male, the primary distinction being that where the Alpha “recharges” in groups you “recharge” by being alone. Like the alpha male you are confident, intelligent and have a sense of charisma about you, but unlike the alpha male, you are completely your own person. Your strength doesn’t flow from those around you, it comes from within. You do not need anyone, and you can even be emotionally distant due to your complete self-possession, though you won’t see yourself as distant at all. You trust few people and foster even fewer intimate relationships, people must earn your trust, it is not given freely. Omegas generally make the best leaders, though they never seek out the position. More accurately, it is cast upon them by their peers at which point they reluctantly accept the position until their primary goals are achieved; at which point they seek to leave the position as quickly as possible, which is the polar opposite of the Alpha Male. George Washington is famously Omega in leadership personality and was called “The greatest character of our age” for stepping down from his position of power willingly, despite popular demand for him to stay in power.

Gamma Male: You are sort of the “invisible” guy. There is nothing really spectacular about you. You are not a beta, but neither are you an Alpha or Omega. Your personality and presence usually blends in with the rest of the room and you’re just sort of…there. People like you just fine and you usually don’t have too much trouble with girls, but all the same, there is nothing particularly memorable or remarkable about you. You are not a born leader nor an inherent follower, although you can take on those tasks depending on the situation. In social situations you can often be a neutralizing force, diffusing situations that would otherwise become dramatic. Bureaucrats and diplomacy are two strong fields for this type, though technical tasks performed in isolation, not in a team, are another avenue.

Sigma Male: You are a manipulative mastermind. You are a spider waiting to lay your trap. You possess a cunning, intuitive mind and can sway people to your will. You don’t have the casual swagger of the alpha or the omega but you do have a clever presence about you and people tend to be both wary and respect you for that. You can often be even more powerful than the alpha or the omega male in social situations due to your ability to persuade and manipulate them, though never on points they care about. You are neither a follower nor a leader but rather a wild card. Cyrus Tolliver (Deadwood) is probably the best example of this type.”

women-love-alpha-males

What do you guys think? And – which one describes you?